When I was younger, I felt that in order to die happy, I had to live under a model of thinking in which I would only do things that pleased me, negating all negative and positive values of right and wrong in terms of human norms and family expectations. My reasoning being that no aspect of the world around me should force me into a mode of living that was not satisfying to me personally.
Later, I realized that doing only what would please me did not always intersect or run parallel with all the infinite experiences that the world around me had to offer me. My new idea of a satisfying life worked to come as close as possible to 'do everything, see everything, and know everything'. Don't laugh. :)
As of right now, this model holds true, but probably not with as much intent. I realize now that my goal isn't to be satisfied when I die, just satisfied throughout my life. I feel I might become a depressed senior citizen if I don't accomplish or at least experience many things. Essentially, it would be redundant to exit life without fully indulging in everything that humans are capable of; experiance, knowledge, relations, etc.
On this topic, I tend to make recurring lists, idealizing and simplifying where possible.
These will happen before I die.
- 2nd language
- A system of living that I will design for myself personally, all aspects considered
- Handwrite in a serif typeface of my choosing (Bold uppercase included)
- A lover
- Fantasie Impromptu on the piano
- Travel
- Design processes over and over again :)
